kau cahaya;
siapa sangka
kau mampu
buat begitu

dicari dan dinanti
menunggu dalam diam
untuk kau
pulang ke rumah

kau berkhidmat 
untuk negara
demi mencari
aman sejahtera

terima kasih 
aku ungkapkan
untuk Malaysia
yang aman damai 

-sofia t.

isn't it

isn't it insane
;to love him deeply
;to waste all your time
just to obsess so keenly?

isn't it eerie
to feel your rib cage crashing
to spend too much dimes
to capture his feelings?

isn't it bizzare
to hurt yourself everyday
for he to told you he despise of you
and make you feel like nothing

oh my, oh my
love will make you cry
oh dear, oh dear
love is now my fear



when i say
that i'm lost

its not because i dont know who i am
;or where i am
;or who i am supposed to be

oddly enough,
its because i know myself exactly
i'm so complex
;that i cannot comprehend

;lost is not a result
;lost is not an attitude
lost is a feeling


here's to the people

Here's to the silent,
;the sad people,
;and the lonely

To the one who loved too much,
; and given their all
;and got nothing for return

Here's to the people who smokes endlessly
;to ease the pain,
and to the depressed who cry themselves to sleep

To the ones who hurt but dont show
;and the ones who constantly think of suicide
that no one knows

to the one whose hopes are left to rot
and the one who screams and cry

listen and read,
someday, it will all be okay

if its not okay, then its not the end
because at the end,
everything will be okay


she wonder

he once loves a girl
who was as deep
as the ocean
so deep
;till he could feel the breeze
but he never heard she speaks through her voice
when she cries

she wonder
if a man could ever love her
;for everything she was
;for everthing she were
;and for everything she are now
stormy night & calm morning
all those secret
that lay on the bottom of the sea

she wonder if he could safe her
who was as deep
as ocean
she ask herself
if he loves the mystery
and all the creatures
that swam
inside her mind

Because he was to busy
to make her happy
he never noticed
that she was drowning


never knew

she had blue skin,
so did he.

He kept it hidden,
And so did she.

They search for blue
Their whole life through

Then passed right by,
And they never knew


i remember now

it was raining hard, that day
the pavements were wet
and it was cold

I saw you walking, shivering
walking down across the road
bitting your lips asking for heat

you were wearing faded black jeans
in old roshe nike shoe 
you once told me its your favourite

i was under red grant roof which used to be our coffee shop
you were heading my way 
step by step, closer

i want to run, but i want to see
the person 
that i used to love

as you walked past me
you stop
turning around and see the clearer view of me

i was nervous
i dont know what to do
should i say hi

But then, you smiled at me,
and everything felt familiar
like I belonged to that place, right across you

But everything became blur afterwards
I remember now
It was long ago, since i lost you



i always wonder
birds stay in the same place
when they can fly
anywhere on the earth

then i ask myself
the same question


in hope

she was only fifteen
when someone told her fat
so she clutched her stomach and skipped meals
in hope she lose a few pounds

she was only fifteen
when her boyfriend left for another girl
so she puts on more make up and changed her wardrobe
in hope that someone would find her pretty

she was only fifteen
when she was diagnosed with neurofibrosa schwanomma
so she was in and out for hospital treatment
in hope someone would visit her

She was only sixteen
when she cried herself to sleep because everyone left her
so she put her face into the pillow
in hope no one would hear her

she was only sixteen
when she got the first scar on her left elbow
so she wore sleeves over the summer
in hope no one would see her scars

She was only sixteen
when she took her own life
she stop fighting for living
in hope people will remember her death


never will i understand why

Never will I understand how a month ago
you were telling me you love me

Then you turn around giving your love to somebody else
implored with condelescence to me
you once say i was your everything

Never will I understand why you only
fought for yourself ;; your love once
which by not me

Never will I understand why

I'm still in love with you
and what we had is
only what we used to be



She buried her head in books
so no one could see the
emptiness in her eyes

She filled her mind
with fictional fantasies
and hope that one day
they would become real

but because her eyes
was stuck in a book
she never got the chance
to have adventure on her own